Maagang Mag-umaga sa Concepcion

Nililigawan ko pa lang ang alarm
na huwag na muna akong abalahin
kahit ako naman ang nagtakda ng oras
ng aking paggising
Ngunit araw na mismo pala ang gigising
sa aking nagpipilit na
pumikit na mga mata
at bubulabog
sa mga lamok
na bumulabog sa akin
kagabi
Akala ko’y nagloloko na ang aking cellphone
Nabuwang sa tagal ng mga araw
na walang signal
Sinag pala ang kumalabit
at sumilip sa mga butas ng dingding
kung saan nakasandal
ang namamahinga kong ulo
Nililigawan ko pa lang ang alarm
ngunit ginising na ako ng araw
pagsapit ng alas-singko

Law of Inertia

(Note: I wrote this prose while traveling from Concepcion (Arteche, Eastern Samar) to the town proper this morning on a three-hour boat ride.)

When you’re riding a bote –
that kind of boat without whatchamacallit,
those sorta wings attached to the rear
to keep the vessel in balance
(resembling, duh, a bottle) –
think of a Lav Diaz film
Hele sa Hiwagang Hapis, in particular

It only takes about three hours
to get to poblacion from Concepcion
across Oras River,
much shorter than
to watch Hele in one sitting –
that eight-hour bitch –
but (feels) much longer
without a book
and/or bathroom breaks

So rather than despising why
the entire walking and finding some hero’s bones
have to be shown,
or loathing why the three-hour ordeal has to be dealt with:
Revel in the long shots
of seemingly never-ending lines
of coconut trees and indigenous grasses
from the shaking boat’s window

There may never come a time
when you can take pleasure in this
tranquility of the nonmoving
while you’re moving
but if you really feel like it:
You may take heaps of sleep
but not too much, I warn you!
OK to miss some parts
but not the eventful ones –
those parts where
the boat is about to take a wild right turn, or left
or when the center of gravity shifts to
God knows where
jolting the bottoms of a number of dozing passengers (the boat leaves at 3 a.m.!, by the way),
or when the morning light switches on
from the specks of dawn,
when the gray blanket of space becomes cerulean

Speaking of which!
Should you feel blue
Think: there’s a lot more good
in appreciating the normally gruelling travel aboard the bote
sans storms or busted motor;
in viewing the film till the end credits
sans the colors and the yawning audiences

You may never find Bonifacio’s remains
but you will get there
to the station at the town proper
and you will feel everything around you becoming
busy again,
moving
fast again,
spinning like an auto dryer
or lovers in a Korean drama in a series finale,
while you stand still, so still you’re going to breathe in the freshest air there is, and
sigh the oligatory words:
I’m back in the real world!
– when actually
you’ve been in the real world all along.

Open Love Letter to Alyssa Valdez

Dearest Alyssa,

Don’t worry. This is about volleyball. This is not about showbiz or an issue I have with how you play (who has an issue, really?). This is about a sport you love and I came to love (after watching Ella de Jesus play back in third year college, kailangan ko talagang maisingit). This is about the sport that we both love and many out there do.

This is about what we can do together in the name of love – our love for volleyball.

I am writing to you to share an experience I had this week that has to do with our beloved sport. But I’ll give you a little context first: I am working as a communications officer for disaster management in a Jesuit NGO. Pretty unusual job, right? But with this work I happen to go around the country with our project officers, to the farthest that we can get, to coordinate rehab projects with disaster-afflicted communities and write stories about them and their progress. Just this week, a few days before your first game in this UAAP season, we went to the eastern edge of the Philippines, in Barangay Concepcion, Arteche, Eastern Samar where there was absolutely no mobile signal, just to grace the blessing of their newly-established piggery and poultry. How did we travel there? 8 hours of land transportation from Tacloban City to Oras, Eastern Samar and an hour of combined habal-habal (extended motorcycle ride), walking in a muddy field, and a boat ride. A total of 9 hours of travel just to see how the community is doing with the project we helped put up with them.

But that was not all that was there to be seen.

In the school we stayed in that night, St. Magdalena of Canossa Catholic High School, I saw some lady students gearing up after class to play volleyball. I learned from their superintendent that the students would be competing for an interschool tournament in February and half-jokingly asked us if we could assist in training them. My companion and I do play volleyball but we are not professionally good enough to train them. I realized that in an isolated place like this, there is obviously no opportunity for a professional training and all the students can do is to work around with the facility and limited equipment they have.

But we played with them. They were very persistent kids, you know. They apparently had much to learn about the sport, such as they didn’t know their right playing positions, but they worked hard to gain their team chemistry. They made do with their old volleyballs, which were so hard to play with that up to this time of writing I still had red spots on my arm after using them. The students also played without good sports attire. They couldn’t afford them the way they are unable to afford their education, the reason why the private-run St. Magdalena’s offer their high school education for free to them! The students didn’t even have uniforms for their upcoming interschool tournament. During training, their superintendent teased them while pointing at us: “Show off your skills now and they might sponsor you!” If I were rich, I’d probably do!

I thought while playing what a wonderful world this would be if only young people like them have the opportunity to hone their skills in things they are passionate about. They deserve it. They deserve brand-new volleyballs. They deserve a better facility. But I know those things do not simply happen considering their situation.

That is the biggest reason why I want to reach you. Maybe not to ask you to train them (citing your distance and your busy schedule), or to give them new volleyballs (not your responsibility at all but they’ll be extremely happy if you do that, I guess), or to help them put up a better training facility (that’s too much actually), BUT to ask you to do what you do best – inspire people.

Now it’s time for you to meet Bakhita, Francine, Charles Darwin, and Marian – your fans. They are members of the school’s volleyball varsity team. We got to play with them. They do watch UAAP volleyball and I am not surprised to know that Ateneo is their most favorite team. They love you, the Lady Eagles’ star, of course. Imagine that this is how far your inspiration to young people gets. To the easternmost side of the Philippines, to what they already call the peripheries.

So before we left their community, I had an idea. You and I are both from Ateneo and although I haven’t had the chance to interact with you when I was still studying, I know I have better chances to reach you. I too have the little privilege of watching your games live while these students are only able to see you on TV. After knowing that they love the game and that they love you, I know I shouldn’t pass on the opportunity to at least help them get their message across to you. And so here it is:

You know I first thought of asking help from you to help them get sponsorship or try to convince you to visit them. But I know these are too much to ask for. Given your grueling schedule atop your academic responsibilities at your final year, I then thought that a few kind words from you might be enough to boost the spirits of the students when they play on February and or in their future games.

Maybe a word or two? I don’t know. But if you get to read this and you decide to respond to their message, we may sit down or you may talk to me and I promise to do my best to send your reply back to them – in form of a letter you make, or a video you shoot, or whatever you may think of. Or maybe even more than a message, but it’s up to you. It will be a small gift for them really, but it will definitely matter to them – on the day of their tournament and event beyond that. Let’s work on this in the name of our love for volleyball and in the name of those who love the sport, like the varsity team of St. Magdalena’s. I shall wait for your answer.

But in any way, I am hoping that the smiles of Bakhita, Francine, Charles Darwin, and Marian will bring you the best of luck on your first game this season – and the games that will follow, all the way to another title! I know that from the moment you earn the trophy once again, these kids will feel like champions too. #HeartStrong, beh.

So long and may the Force be with you!

Love,

Xavier – and the children of Concepcion

P.S.
xavieralvaran@gmail.com
09164320252